1. Jimmyjam Slammers: They just only got stronger after winning the pennant last season.
2. Team Suck: Greinke, Cain, Beckett and a great lineup will challenge the Slammers for the No. 1 spot.
3. Backward Ks: The Ks took big steps forward this season and will be right in the hunt for the No. 2 seed, if not the pennant.
4. Graybill’s Generals: A few questions on offense and looking for someone to step up with Lincecum will be key this season.
5. Vandelay Industries: Taking over the Evening News is a lucky task. Retooling with several prospects means they might be a year away from competing. Then again, Heyward might have something to say about that.
6. Noisy Basterds: By no means are the Basterds the worst team in the Office Space League. With a new owner and a bit of retooling, they’re better than last year. It’s just hard to take last year’s cellar dweller and put them in the playoffs at this point.
Wild-Card Round
Gameday Gamblers over Sex Panthers
Team Suck over Backward Ks
League Championship Series
Dolph’s Destroyers over Gameday Gamblers
Team Suck over Jimmyjam Slammers
2010 Fantasy World Series
Dolph’s Destroyers over Team Suck
JimmyJam Slammers
The offense is back and the pitching has been retooled, and as long as the Slammers avoid serious injuries, they should be back in the hunt for the Office Space League pennant for the third time in four years.
Average, singles, doubles and triples were all big categories for the Slammers last season and that should be no different.
Projected to bat .296 as a team, the Slammers should equal or better their numbers in most categories.
Eight out of 10 starters are projected to have 100 or more singles — to other two are projected to have 98 and 93.
Forty-four triples are expected along with 123 steals, a category that generally has not been a strong point for the Slammers.
The biggest problem could be the youth, as they are relying on NL Rookie of the Year Chris Coghlan and Andrew McCutchen to not have a sophomore slump.
They’re also relying on Kansas City’s Billy Butler and Alberto Callaspo to duplicate their great 2009 seasons.
Victor Martinez, Joey Votto, Chase Utley, Chipper Jones, Denard Span and Hanley Ramirez are virtual locks.
The pitching also has some questions, like will Cole Hamels and Joe Saunders bounce back after sub-par 2009 seasons to return to their 2008 forms.
The Slammers are also looking for last season’s big call-ups Tommy Hanson and Brian Matusz to step up and have big years.
Matusz went 5-2 after his call-up and Hanson was 11-4.
Outside of the starters, the four closers — Jonathan Broxton, Francisco Cordero, Chad Qualls and Bobby Jenks — are projected to 144 saves, which would set a new league record.
Team Suck
Team Suck was one of the best pitching teams in the league last season.
Odds are, he’ll be there again.
With a projected 980 strikeouts from his top five starters alone — Josh Beckett, Zack Greinke, Matt Cain, Max Scherzer and Jonathan Sanchez — it won’t be hard for him to hold down the pitching stats.
He also has good sleeper picks in Johnny Cueto, who fell apart after the All-Star Break last season, and could bounce back, and Chris Tillman, one of Baltimore’s top young pitchers.
Now, he just needs the offense to come around — a problem for the Suck last season.
Russell Martin and Manny Ramirez were a big reason for the poor offense as Martin had a down year and Ramirez, well, you know what he did — or didn’t do.
They should bounce back this year, and added with the power of Prince Fielder (46 HRs) and Mark Reynolds (44 HRs) and the speed of Jimmy Rollins (32 steals) and Chone Figgins (35), the Suck could control those two categories all season.
Nate McLouth takes over in center field, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see my sleeper pick who I forgot to draft, Colby Rasmus, take his spot.
Also, if Carlos Beltran ever returns to the Mets lineup — I hope he doesn’t — he could retake that CF position for the Suck.
Backward Ks
Obviously, we can’t talk about the Backward Ks without talking about strikeouts.
Let’s start with strikeouts from pitchers.
Ricky Nolasco and Javier Vazquez are both 200-plus strikeout guys and added with starters John Lackey, Dice-K, Scott Feldman, Randy Wolf and Clayton Richard, the Ks should easily surpass 1,000 strikeouts this season.
Ninety wins also is not impossible, but that’s dependant on a bounce-back year from Dice-K.
Ninety saves also is not out of question with closers Brian Wilson, David Aarsma and Carlos Marmol. At least, if an injury hits, he has two solid closer. But three puts him in good shape.
Now let’s look at strikeouts from batters.
With Ryan Howard, Shin-Soo Choo, Justin Upton and Tori Hunter expected to combine for at least 600 strikeouts, the Ks will be at a loss in that category most weeks.
But, where there is a negative, there are about 10 positives.
Those strikeouts kings will provide power, projected to hit a combined 129 home runs. Add that with Aaron Hill’s projection of 25 and Pablo Sandoval’s 24, and the Backward Ks might change their name to the Frontward Home Run Trots.
Well, that’s kind of long and stupid, but appropriate.
He also will bat about .280 to .285 on the season — Ryan Howard pulls this down, but you can’t sit him — and pound out some singles with Yadier Molina, Hill, Sandoval, Yunel Escobar, Julio Borbon and Erick Aybar projected to have better-than 100 singles each.
Borbon, Aybar and Upton will add speed and bring in some triples and stolen bases.
The Ks have a lot of categories covered and I like what I’m seeing.
Without any pitching setbacks, the Ks will make the playoffs and challenge for the Office Space League pennant.
Graybill’s Generals
With three No. 1 starters in Roy Oswalt, Jake Peavy and, oh yeah, Tim Lincecum, the Generals are in good shape when it comes to wins, ERA and strikeouts.
Rich Harden and Carlos Zambrano will help with the strikeouts, too — not so much ERA.
Those five are the starting five, for sure.
On offense, who knows who will start?
The Generals are loaded at every position but shortstop and catcher.
It will tough — and sometimes frustrating — to set the daily lineup with players going in and out of streaks.
Then again, it will be nice is Dustin Pedroia goes down with an injury or struggles, to send in Luis Castillo or Ben Zobrist; or if Adrian Gonazalez goes down, Lance Berkman and Casey Kotchman are itching to start.
It also could be good come trade deadline if the Generals are in it and needing something in particular — or out of it and looking for prospects.
Either way, the offense should be fine if the micro-managing is done properly.
Vandelay Industries
The former Evening News ballclub has a new owner and like the Marlins, he cleared house and brought in the young guys.
With future stars like Jason Heyward, Carlos Santana, Buster Posey, Michael Stanton, Dustin Ackley, Gaby Sanchez and Ian Desmond.
And that’s just the batters.
He also grabbed Neftali Feliz and Bud Norris, along with the AL Rookie of the Year, Andrew Bailey.
Clearly, youth was key for the Industrial squad.
Four of those nine prospects are in MLB.com’s top 10 prospects. Five are in the top 21.
He also has a stranglehold on two of the top catching prospects in Buster Posey (SF) and Carlos Santana (CLE). Posey has been compared to Joe Mauer, and was taken one round before I could grab him.
So what does this mean for the Industries?
Well, if a few of these guys are called up to play this season, it won’t be until the middle of the summer, which means the Industries will be waiting — and that means the wins will be on hold, too.
But if 25 percent of those prospects develop into stars, he’s in good shape.
As for the here and now, the pitching is relying on Johan Santana returning to his Minnesota form and Clay Buchholz coming around in Boston. Add that with Roy Halladay and Yovani Gallardo, and this starting rotation is looking good.
Depth, however, is a question.
Joakim Soria, Bailey, Matt Lindstrom and Ryan Madson, added with Feliz, will be good in the bullpen, but aside from Madson and Feliz, they’re all on (predicted) losing teams, which limits their success.
On offense, the highlights are Carl Crawford, Matt Kemp, Jayson Werth and Adam Lind.
Outside of those guys, the rest of the lineup has question marks.
Noisy Basterds
The Basterds had autodraft fail him.
With only three backup pitchers, that could be a problem spot as the season progresses.
Which means, with 13 bench players who hold bats, a trade could be in the works.
But, he has to figure out who, because there are some questions on offense, too.
Brian McCann at catcher, James Loney at first, Howie Kendrick at second, Matt Holliday in left, Ichiro Suzuki in right are definite starters.
Slated to start at third is Pedro Feliz, but offensively, the Basterds are hoping the Angels new third baseman, Brandon Wood, finds the bat he had in Triple-A. With power, Wood could be a dynamic hitter for the Basterds, but the waiting game cannot go on for too long, because either the Basterds or the Angels will give up on him.
Carlos Gonzalez also may take over in center if B.J. Upton can’t return to his 2007 form.
If the offense comes together, added with big years from Ted Lilly, Jon Lester, Jair Jurrjens and Jon Danks, the Basterds could make a splash in his first year in the JimmyJam League.
2. Team Suck: Greinke, Cain, Beckett and a great lineup will challenge the Slammers for the No. 1 spot.
3. Backward Ks: The Ks took big steps forward this season and will be right in the hunt for the No. 2 seed, if not the pennant.
4. Graybill’s Generals: A few questions on offense and looking for someone to step up with Lincecum will be key this season.
5. Vandelay Industries: Taking over the Evening News is a lucky task. Retooling with several prospects means they might be a year away from competing. Then again, Heyward might have something to say about that.
6. Noisy Basterds: By no means are the Basterds the worst team in the Office Space League. With a new owner and a bit of retooling, they’re better than last year. It’s just hard to take last year’s cellar dweller and put them in the playoffs at this point.
Wild-Card Round
Gameday Gamblers over Sex Panthers
Team Suck over Backward Ks
League Championship Series
Dolph’s Destroyers over Gameday Gamblers
Team Suck over Jimmyjam Slammers
2010 Fantasy World Series
Dolph’s Destroyers over Team Suck
JimmyJam Slammers
The offense is back and the pitching has been retooled, and as long as the Slammers avoid serious injuries, they should be back in the hunt for the Office Space League pennant for the third time in four years.
Average, singles, doubles and triples were all big categories for the Slammers last season and that should be no different.
Projected to bat .296 as a team, the Slammers should equal or better their numbers in most categories.
Eight out of 10 starters are projected to have 100 or more singles — to other two are projected to have 98 and 93.
Forty-four triples are expected along with 123 steals, a category that generally has not been a strong point for the Slammers.
The biggest problem could be the youth, as they are relying on NL Rookie of the Year Chris Coghlan and Andrew McCutchen to not have a sophomore slump.
They’re also relying on Kansas City’s Billy Butler and Alberto Callaspo to duplicate their great 2009 seasons.
Victor Martinez, Joey Votto, Chase Utley, Chipper Jones, Denard Span and Hanley Ramirez are virtual locks.
The pitching also has some questions, like will Cole Hamels and Joe Saunders bounce back after sub-par 2009 seasons to return to their 2008 forms.
The Slammers are also looking for last season’s big call-ups Tommy Hanson and Brian Matusz to step up and have big years.
Matusz went 5-2 after his call-up and Hanson was 11-4.
Outside of the starters, the four closers — Jonathan Broxton, Francisco Cordero, Chad Qualls and Bobby Jenks — are projected to 144 saves, which would set a new league record.
Team Suck
Team Suck was one of the best pitching teams in the league last season.
Odds are, he’ll be there again.
With a projected 980 strikeouts from his top five starters alone — Josh Beckett, Zack Greinke, Matt Cain, Max Scherzer and Jonathan Sanchez — it won’t be hard for him to hold down the pitching stats.
He also has good sleeper picks in Johnny Cueto, who fell apart after the All-Star Break last season, and could bounce back, and Chris Tillman, one of Baltimore’s top young pitchers.
Now, he just needs the offense to come around — a problem for the Suck last season.
Russell Martin and Manny Ramirez were a big reason for the poor offense as Martin had a down year and Ramirez, well, you know what he did — or didn’t do.
They should bounce back this year, and added with the power of Prince Fielder (46 HRs) and Mark Reynolds (44 HRs) and the speed of Jimmy Rollins (32 steals) and Chone Figgins (35), the Suck could control those two categories all season.
Nate McLouth takes over in center field, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see my sleeper pick who I forgot to draft, Colby Rasmus, take his spot.
Also, if Carlos Beltran ever returns to the Mets lineup — I hope he doesn’t — he could retake that CF position for the Suck.
Backward Ks
Obviously, we can’t talk about the Backward Ks without talking about strikeouts.
Let’s start with strikeouts from pitchers.
Ricky Nolasco and Javier Vazquez are both 200-plus strikeout guys and added with starters John Lackey, Dice-K, Scott Feldman, Randy Wolf and Clayton Richard, the Ks should easily surpass 1,000 strikeouts this season.
Ninety wins also is not impossible, but that’s dependant on a bounce-back year from Dice-K.
Ninety saves also is not out of question with closers Brian Wilson, David Aarsma and Carlos Marmol. At least, if an injury hits, he has two solid closer. But three puts him in good shape.
Now let’s look at strikeouts from batters.
With Ryan Howard, Shin-Soo Choo, Justin Upton and Tori Hunter expected to combine for at least 600 strikeouts, the Ks will be at a loss in that category most weeks.
But, where there is a negative, there are about 10 positives.
Those strikeouts kings will provide power, projected to hit a combined 129 home runs. Add that with Aaron Hill’s projection of 25 and Pablo Sandoval’s 24, and the Backward Ks might change their name to the Frontward Home Run Trots.
Well, that’s kind of long and stupid, but appropriate.
He also will bat about .280 to .285 on the season — Ryan Howard pulls this down, but you can’t sit him — and pound out some singles with Yadier Molina, Hill, Sandoval, Yunel Escobar, Julio Borbon and Erick Aybar projected to have better-than 100 singles each.
Borbon, Aybar and Upton will add speed and bring in some triples and stolen bases.
The Ks have a lot of categories covered and I like what I’m seeing.
Without any pitching setbacks, the Ks will make the playoffs and challenge for the Office Space League pennant.
Graybill’s Generals
With three No. 1 starters in Roy Oswalt, Jake Peavy and, oh yeah, Tim Lincecum, the Generals are in good shape when it comes to wins, ERA and strikeouts.
Rich Harden and Carlos Zambrano will help with the strikeouts, too — not so much ERA.
Those five are the starting five, for sure.
On offense, who knows who will start?
The Generals are loaded at every position but shortstop and catcher.
It will tough — and sometimes frustrating — to set the daily lineup with players going in and out of streaks.
Then again, it will be nice is Dustin Pedroia goes down with an injury or struggles, to send in Luis Castillo or Ben Zobrist; or if Adrian Gonazalez goes down, Lance Berkman and Casey Kotchman are itching to start.
It also could be good come trade deadline if the Generals are in it and needing something in particular — or out of it and looking for prospects.
Either way, the offense should be fine if the micro-managing is done properly.
Vandelay Industries
The former Evening News ballclub has a new owner and like the Marlins, he cleared house and brought in the young guys.
With future stars like Jason Heyward, Carlos Santana, Buster Posey, Michael Stanton, Dustin Ackley, Gaby Sanchez and Ian Desmond.
And that’s just the batters.
He also grabbed Neftali Feliz and Bud Norris, along with the AL Rookie of the Year, Andrew Bailey.
Clearly, youth was key for the Industrial squad.
Four of those nine prospects are in MLB.com’s top 10 prospects. Five are in the top 21.
He also has a stranglehold on two of the top catching prospects in Buster Posey (SF) and Carlos Santana (CLE). Posey has been compared to Joe Mauer, and was taken one round before I could grab him.
So what does this mean for the Industries?
Well, if a few of these guys are called up to play this season, it won’t be until the middle of the summer, which means the Industries will be waiting — and that means the wins will be on hold, too.
But if 25 percent of those prospects develop into stars, he’s in good shape.
As for the here and now, the pitching is relying on Johan Santana returning to his Minnesota form and Clay Buchholz coming around in Boston. Add that with Roy Halladay and Yovani Gallardo, and this starting rotation is looking good.
Depth, however, is a question.
Joakim Soria, Bailey, Matt Lindstrom and Ryan Madson, added with Feliz, will be good in the bullpen, but aside from Madson and Feliz, they’re all on (predicted) losing teams, which limits their success.
On offense, the highlights are Carl Crawford, Matt Kemp, Jayson Werth and Adam Lind.
Outside of those guys, the rest of the lineup has question marks.
Noisy Basterds
The Basterds had autodraft fail him.
With only three backup pitchers, that could be a problem spot as the season progresses.
Which means, with 13 bench players who hold bats, a trade could be in the works.
But, he has to figure out who, because there are some questions on offense, too.
Brian McCann at catcher, James Loney at first, Howie Kendrick at second, Matt Holliday in left, Ichiro Suzuki in right are definite starters.
Slated to start at third is Pedro Feliz, but offensively, the Basterds are hoping the Angels new third baseman, Brandon Wood, finds the bat he had in Triple-A. With power, Wood could be a dynamic hitter for the Basterds, but the waiting game cannot go on for too long, because either the Basterds or the Angels will give up on him.
Carlos Gonzalez also may take over in center if B.J. Upton can’t return to his 2007 form.
If the offense comes together, added with big years from Ted Lilly, Jon Lester, Jair Jurrjens and Jon Danks, the Basterds could make a splash in his first year in the JimmyJam League.
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