Four matchups were in question on Monday Night, so that made
for a tense night throughout half the JFL, and of course, that included my
team.
The Toasters needed a big night from Eric Decker, but after
2.1 points, he left with an injury and gave the Cheese Steaks his second win.
The Attack needed a big night from Jay Cutler and Brandon
Marshall, but injuries and an unfortunate hands-to-the-face penalty ruined his
chance, allowing Fear to hold on.
He’s now 3-0.
And so are the Jammers, after surviving what seemed to be
the an improbable situation, leading by only 12 points with Matt Forte going on
the other side. Somehow Forte only scored 8.8 and the Jammers held on for the
close win.
Together, the Jammers and Fear sweated it out in the fourth
quarter knowing that one screen pass from Cutler to Forte for a TD would have
doomed them both. In fact, earlier in the game, that almost happened, but a
diving shoe-string tackle brought Forte down. He had a clear path to the end
zone. It was so unbelievable that I swear it was planned.
But he stayed out of the end zone and the Jammers and Fear
remained undefeated in the JFL.
Houserville wanted to remain in the ranks of the undefeated,
but Chris Ivory scored 10.4 points on Monday to lift the Noise to a 108.6-104.4
win.
The other matchups were all decided on Sunday, and man, were
there some low point totals. Once again, injuries made their mark on Sunday;
but some big-time fantasy players just didn’t show up.
LeSean McCoy had just 2.2 points, Matthew Stafford and
Calvin Johnson didn’t reach 10 points and Aaron Rodgers had 14.
And after several big tight end performances in Weeks 1 and
2, Week 3 brought out a lighter week as only Greg Olsen, Martellus Bennett and
Rob Gronkowski hit double-digits. For some, this was a killer.
Here’s how Week 3 unfolded.
Jimmy Jammers 80.9,
Jerkin’ My Kirk Herbstreit 76.8
NO JINX: This
blog post could have been posted much earlier if I didn’t proof read it this
morning and realize that I didn’t write a recap for my own matchup. I was so
scared of jinxing anything Monday night that I didn’t even bother setting up a
template for this set of game notes.
DOWN TO THE WIRE:
There was a point where the Bears were on the Jets’ 21 late in the fourth
quarter and I led the Jerk by 4.1 points. Unless Forte scored a TD, there was
no feasible way to score 4.1 points. I felt pretty good, but the Jets, on their ensuing drive, quickly made it to fourth down and needed a conversion. They
still had all three timeouts, so if the Bears got the ball back, I would have
had to worry about Forte once more. But Geno Smith completed a clutch pass and the
drive continued and ended after all timeouts had been used. A few Jay Cutler
kneel-downs lowered my blood pressure significantly.
MANNING LIVING UP TO
THE 24: I said that 24 points would be all Jerk wants from Eli Manning, and
what do you know, he hits 23.4. That almost made the difference because
Matthew Stafford was a mess Sunday fantasy-wise. He still led the Lions to
victory, but his 9.8 points were nearly a killer for me.
OK, ROOK, IT’S YOUR
TURN: Sunday opened the door to backup QBs on both fantasy franchises. For
the Jerk, Teddy Bridgewater saw his first action after Matt Cassel broke his
foot, and he’ll be the man going forward. He only had 10.2 fantasy points
Sunday, but he’s got a lot of talent around him and a bunch of first-team snaps to take during the week. For the Jammers, it was Blake
Bortles getting onto the field, passing for 223 yards and two TDs (26 fantasy
points). Bortles should be back our there this weekend. Maybe he’ll crack the
Jammers lineup, too.
Fear and Loathing
115, Shark Attack 108.6
HAD IT, LOST IT:
If there’s one thing to surmise the franchise history of the Attack, it’s what
happened Monday night. Jay Cutler hit Brandon Marshall for a TD pass that cut
the lead to less than two points. Cutler then would have scored the necessary
points to win on the next drive. But that play was called back and the points
were taken off the board. Marshall also got injured and put up a big zero until he made one catch late.
FEAR TRENDING:
They say once is an anomaly; twice is a coincidence and three times is a trend.
Well, at 3-0, Fear is a trend. With 44 points from Andrew Luck and four more
double-digit performances, Fear scored more than 100 points for the third
straight week. He has the highest scoring offense and we all should be scared
of him.
LUCK NO MORE: OK,
we all have to apologize. Andrew Luck was a steal at No. 9 overall. His 44
points in Week 3 will easily keep him ranked No. 1 overall at the QB position
in fantasy. Still no backup, but Fear is living on the edge. He’s dangerous
that way.
WEED DROP: Man,
we all let Le’Veon Bell drop to the third round because of a little run-in with
the law. Fear didn’t care and with his selections of DeMarco Murray and Bell,
we can only be jealous. They’re the reason he’s 3-0, each posting their third
straight double-digit performance. Together, they are averaging point totals
that we haven’t seen from a JLB RB duo since Noise ran to the Super Bowl in
2009 with Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown.
World of Noise 108.6,
Real Houserville 104.4
OMITTED: Oh man,
how on Earth could I forget this matchup? The Noise has won another over the
Ville. The all-time series is still 10-4 in favor of Houserville, but the Noise
is poking away at domination.
BALLED UP: I told
you I didn’t like Montee Ball. He had 14.7 points in Week 1 because he got into
the end zone, but his yardage totals in three weeks have been 67, 60 and 38.
Not too impressive. Knile Davis is a guy I like, and he’s had two explosive
performances in back-to-back weeks, but Jamaal Charles won’t be out forever,
and Ville may have an RB problem.
THE WHITE KNIGHT:
Chris Ivory has three straight double-digit performances. He’s splitting the
workload, but the Noise will certainly welcome these kind of numbers from the
No. 10 back in fantasy. And if Reggie Bush’s 17.1 points were his wake-up call
for 2014, perhaps the Noise is ready to take on Fear and his two RBs of doom.
RODGER-COASTER: Aaron
Rodgers had 14 points in Week 1. Then he had 40.8 in Week 2. Then he had 14 in
Week 3. If he has 40 in Week 4, I’m going to call Six Flags and tell them I
have an idea.
T-Money 128.8,
Chalupa Batman 87.1
LYNCH, RIVERS, AND….?:
For the Mets, the 2013 baseball season was Matt Harvey and pray for rain. For
Chalupa Batman, Marshawn Lynch and Philip Rivers have been his “Matt Harvey.”
They combined for 51 of his 87.1 points. Clearly, that’s not going to cut it.
T-MONEY CASHES IN:
Finally, a Sunday goes T-Money’s way. After two weeks of “bleh,” T-Money
exploded for 128.8 points with seven double-digit scorers, including a solid
24.9 points from Tony Romo. Both his running backs, LeGarrette Blount (17.8) and
Rashad Jennings (23.6) had huge outings Sunday, as did Michael Crabtree, who
had his second straight double-digit performance. He went for 80 yards and a
touchdown after going for 82 and a touchdown in Week 2. Overall, for T-Money,
this week’s performance is a welcoming sight after just 81.4 points in Week 1
and 76.1 in Week 2.
POOR LARRY: I
feel really bad for Larry Fitzgerald. He’s got to be the best WR to never get
the chance to show that he could be one of the NFL’s best WRs. Only once in his
career did he have a QB who could get him the ball, and it doesn’t appear like
he ever will again. It certainly doesn’t help Chalupa in 2014.
Channel 4 News Team 90.6,
Team Boyer 45
SPACKLED: Man, 45
points is ugly. Real ugly. It ranks in the top ten (or NOT top ten) of worst
performances in JFL history. Tom Brady led all scorers with another dismal
performance, scoring 16.8 points. That’s now three straight games without
reaching 17 points. The rest of Team Boyer’s players failed to reach anything
higher than 7.3 points.
SMOOTH SAILING:
By the time Monday football rolled around, Geno Smith was just a compiler. It
didn’t matter how points he scored, the News Team was going to win, which is
nice considering the QB situation in News Team’s camp. His 21.5 points merely
added to Boyer’s misery.
BERNARD ON FIRE:
Giovani Bernard is turning into quite the pickup for the News Team. With 12.2
points, 23.9 and now 17.6 in consecutive weeks, he’s easily one of the best
fantasy performers of the young season. His numbers are Jamaal Charles-like. If
only News Team could get Jamaal Charles numbers out of Jamaal Charles.
TIME FOR AUSTIN?:
Austin Davis scored 33.9 points in his second start with the Rams, and if he
can continue to play like this, maybe, just maybe, he’ll be the real answer to
the News Team’s QB debacle. If not, I know someone who has three good ones. ... Or maybe he'll make this whole note worthless with a trade for Cousins. Oh, what? He did that? Well, damn. Wasting my time, Nikish.
Philly Cheese Steaks
87.8, Dottsville Toasters 65.7
THE TWO GUYS I LIKED:
I really liked Nick Foles and Russell Wilson heading into the 2014 season, and
they were targets of mine in the draft. In this matchup, it was all about them.
Foles threw for more than 320 yards for the third straight week, added three
TDs and finished with 35.2 fantasy points. Wilson hasn’t been as explosive, but
he’s been consistent with 24.4, 23.8 and 29.4. Those are numbers the Toasters
loves to see after an up-and-down year with RGIII.
ALL THE
SINGLE-DIGITS, ALL THE SINGLE-DIGITS: I hope you sang that like Beyonce,
because I did when writing it. Outside of the QBs, the only other double-digit
scorer was Cordarrelle Patterson — who has far too many double letters in his
name. His 12.2 points added with the 9-point totals of Brandin Cooks and Alfred
Blue were just enough to beat the Toasters, who came through again with another
negative point total. His negative-2 from the Panthers defense joins a long
list of Rex Grossman-like performances in the Toasters franchise history.
SPRACK TO EARTH:
Darren Sproles was playing on a different level in Weeks 1 and 2. In Week 3, he
returned to Earth with a mere 5.6 points. This is more of what we expect
fantasy-wise out of him. Big weeks and small weeks. We just got fooled by Week
1 and 2. … Or, am I being fooled by Week 3? I guess we’ll find out next week.
Chinese Organ Thieves
102.3, Graybill’s Generals 62.1
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?:
Of course, the week Victor Cruz finally shows up, LeSean McCoy disappears.
McCoy went out early with a suspected concussion, but he somehow passed the
tests and came back. I, however, doubt that he truly passed it because he
looked nothing like himself, scoring 2.2 fantasy points. Meanwhile, Victor Cruz
had 17.7 with 107 yards and a TD.
SLOW EDDIE: It’s
been a sluggish start for Eddie Lacy. In what appeared to be a genius draft
strategy, Lacy and McCoy have not lived up to the preseason praises we were
giving them. Lacy scored 3.7 points after 5.1 in Week 1 and 6.5 in Week 2. If
this continues, the Generals will regret this keeper decision for sure.
AGAIN, AS PREDICTED:
Peyton Manning, Emmanuel Sanders and Julius Thomas combined for 53.9 points in
what seems to be a weekly thing for the Thieves. It’s all he really needs. As
long as he gets the 50-60 points from them, he just needs a few double-digit
performances to finish off his competition. He got that from Pierre Garcon (22)
and Brian Quick (14.6).
C-J-No-Play: How
far has Chris Johnson fallen? Only 10 carries for 34 yards Monday, and he
watched Chris Ivory and Bilal Powell put together better fantasy performances.
This would be the only real scary thing for the Thieves at this point.
Sunday Slackers 77.7,
Choo Big TeeDees 57.3
NOT THERE YET, BUT
CLOSE: Drew Brees had 26.3 points Sunday, which is a season-high, but it’s
not exactly where the Slackers want him to be. He needs the 30, 35-point range
for him to feel safer. Fortunately, this week, he faced Choo, who had just 57.3
points.
GREEN WAS A GO:
A.J. Green made it into the lineup and scored 11.4 points. He didn’t get that
home run ball, but still, he made plays. More importantly, he didn’t put up a
zero.
BORING TORREY: Torrey
Smith hasn’t had the greatest start. Only six catches in three games, totaling
9.7 fantasy points. Perhaps it’s Mohamed Sanu time. He’s getting more targets
and more points. And what the heck, he's throwing TD passes. He completed a 50-yard pass in Week 2 and he had an 18-yard TD pass this past weekend. He's nearly as productive as Tom Brady. Sanu has reached double-digits in back-to-back weeks, so maybe he should line up with A.J. Green. Yes, you run
into trouble when the Bengals stumble, but if you roll with the No. 1 and 2 WRs
from a single team, you’re upping your chances for TDs and double-digit
performances. It has been the recipe for wins over the years for many teams.
SHOULD HAVE KEPT IT
IN THE FAMILY: Choo should have called up his Cousins. I said that if Kirk
Cousins takes over in Washington, he should start in Chooville. But that wasn’t
the case this weekend. Choo stuck with Colin Kaepernick, while Cousins scored
41.5 points on the bench. By itself, it wouldn’t have made the difference, but
together with Hakeem Nicks — who never should have been benched over Denarius
Moore — it would have won him the matchup. ... And damn you, Nikish. You ruined another paragraph with your Monday trade. Can't you wait for Wednesdays?
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