Aceholes!

I’m not particularly happy with my starting pitchers right now, aside from Rich Harden and Gavin Floyd.

Jake Peavy wasn’t so bad either, giving up just a few runs in loss because San Diego has no offense — same thing every year.

But Cole Hamels and CC Sabathia did not start the season like the keepers they are. The two combined for 13 runs in eight innings of work. You know, just your normal 14.63 ERA. Ouch.

I wasn’t the only one hurt by some All-Star opening brain fart starts this season. Tim Lincecum lasted just three innings in his 2009 debut for the Generals, giving up three runs for a 9.00 ERA.

Cliff Lee, last year’s guaranteed gem, gave up seven runs in 5.0 innings for the Drunken Taxis Drivers. The Drunken Cabbies also were disappointed by Ted Lilly, five runs in 5.0 innings.

Brandon Webb gave up six runs in 4.0 innings for the Bombers.

Roy Halladay allowed five runs over 7.0 innings, spoiling the News Team’s opening day.

Dice-K gave up four over 5.1 and Jon Lester and James Shields both gave up five runs in five innings.

You get the picture. Rough week so far.

But, never give up on top pitchers. You always have to give them a few starts and weather the storm, because the moment you give up and put them on the waiver wire is the moment your arch-rival picks them up and wins a World Series.

CC Sabathia started 1-5 last season with a ridiculous ERA of 8-point-something and I was on the verge of giving up. In fact, the one win was after three straight poor outings and I sat him for the fourth start. He allowed one run over nine innings. Acehole, I know.

Still, I stuck with him and he turned things around quickly.

Hopefully for all of us in the league, our pitchers will calm down a tad and not inflate ERAs like we’ve seen this week.

As it stands now, four of 12 teams have an ERA less than 4.00, and just one has an ERA of less than 3.00, the Gameday Gamblers with a 2.66 (as of Friday night at 11:15 p.m.).

Even more interesting is the crap-battle going on between myself and the Backwards Ks (Don’t get me started on grammar. Should be Backward Ks. You don’t go backwards. You go backward!).

Right now, the ERA battle is in the 6-something area and neither team had a pitching win until Jon Garland, a late-round pick-up in the draft for the Slammers, beat the Dodgers Friday.

Maybe CC will add to that win Saturday. The way things have been going, I seriously doubt it. But I’ll still start him. It’s hard to make a 6.00 ERA look worse.

Right, Zito?

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