Here are the MVP candidates separated by conferences. The players are listed in alphabetical order. In Week 14, I will have a poll up for the Office Space Conference. (Originally, it was going to be the Ron Burgundy Conference first, but T-Money and Boyer have not sent their MVP candidates yet. As a result, they’ll be voted on in Week 15 now. I do have the two capsules for Toasters and News Team below. I’ll add Boyer and T-Money’s capsules when they are received.)
EVERYONE will vote for the MVP of the conference. The top two will move on to the final vote in Week 16. In Week 15, we’ll vote for the top two MVPs from the Ron Burgundy Conference, and again, they’ll advance to Week 16.
Please read all the capsules, as written by their team owners. I would like everyone to vote objectively, remembering, it’s what the player did for the fantasy team, not what they did for their NFL team.
Office Space Conference
Joseph Addai, Jammers: I can’t believe this is the name I’m submitting. If you would have told me in August when I drafted him No. 1 that he’d be my MVP, I’d laugh at you and mock you like I do to Houserville daily.
But here I am in December, shoveling snow, freezing my ass off and saying loud and proud that Addai is my MVP.
Addai is averaging 14.1 points per week, which is nothing compared to the big-wig QBs in this League, but winning nine of my last 10 games wasn’t because of a big-wig QB. It was thanks to the consistency of Joseph Addai. He had double-digit performances in nine of my 10 wins and double-digit performances in 10 of 12 weeks.
Of the top seven RBs in fantasy, only Addai and Ray Rice have had 10 double-digit point weeks. Everyone else in the top seven has had at least three single-digit days.
He has scored nine rushing TDs and three receiving and he passed for another, totaling 14 TDs, best among all RBs in the NFL. So, he’s done it all.
He scored 14 points in a big win over the division rival Slackers in Week 5 and another 21.6 against the Slackers to complete the season sweep and wrap up the Jammers' fourth straight division title.
Addai’s 14.1 points per week were huge considering the Jammers had several close contests, finishing the regular season with a point differential of just 11.1 points. Without Addai, many of those wins turn into losses.
Instead, Addai helped the Jammers pump out the JFL’s best record at 10-3 and the No. 1 seed in the Office Space Conference for the third time in four years.
Drew Brees, Sunday Slackers: Drew Brees is the 2009 MVP for the Jimmy Jam League as well as the National Football League.
1. 29 TD passes (1st in League)
2. 344.7 total points scored (2nd in League)
3. 68.8% completion rate (3rd in League)
4. 3,536 passing yards (5th in League)
5. He has averaged 28.7 points a game (2nd in League) .
6. He moved the ball around on offense and 19 different players have scored a TD.
7. Two weeks he has scored over 50 points and only one other quarterback has one game of 50+ points and that’s Tom Brady.
8. His Team is 12-0 (more than likely they would not be 12-0 without him)
That about sums it up...
[Jimmy Jammers’ addition: Parker sent this before I specified that he needed to say why it helped his team, not the Saints. Still, touching on Point No. 8. Yes, the Saints are 12-0, but the Slackers are 7-6 with the Breesy Man. Without the fantasy franchise player, the Slackers could easily be 2-10, like they were in 2008.]
Peyton Manning, Real Houserville: I wouldn't be 7-6 if it weren't for Peyton Manning. He's thrown for 300 yards eight times (and if you round up, nine times b/c he had 299 yards in Week 11), had seven multiple-TD games (including two games with 4 TDs), and always scored me at least 16 points. He's been consistent with yardage all season and he's only had one TD-less game but still threw for 347 yards and no turnovers.
If he weren't in my lineup, it stands to reason there'd be a 20-point difference in the score in any one week, enough to seriously impact my team's record.
Ricky Williams, World of Noise: (Email opens up with the press room screaming)
Mr. Johnson, Mr. Johnson, Who is your first selection for the draft next year?
Mr. Johnson, What do you think of Tiger Wood's wife?
Mr. Johnson, What do you think of Kanye West's storming of the stage?
Sir Craig Johnson, Who is your teams MVP?
___________________Break in the action as the press room quiets down
Well.. To answer your questions in no particular order, Don't know, Hot, and he's a gay fish...
and for the man that called me Sir!.. I will answer your question as I was recently knighted by the Queen herself... So I will answer you because you called me by my correct name.
(awwwww's coming from the room)
I would like to nominate Freddie Mitchell for MVP... why... because I'd like to thank my great hands...
....excuse me (is handed paper)... ahem... I've just been informed that Freddie Mitchell is not on my team so therefore, I retract that last statement. (looks back at assistant) (covers mic) "what a bout Jason Avant? No? I didn't take him this year... Oh .. Ok.”
For this year I would like to nominate... Optimus Prime... he has been a kick ass leader of the Decepticons and well,
(tapping on shoulder)
....what! Oh.. ok.. not him either... can I see my roster...?
..Holy Shit... this is my team? all these great players? WOW... I'm not used to this...
...So I guess I would like to nominate for the 2009 JFL Season MVP Award Mr. Ricky Williams. It's been a tough year, but a good year.. Each week we would go out onto the field (or log into ESPN.com) and hope for the best. The Wildcat was outstanding this year with the duo of Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown averaging roughly 30 points together, but it would not have been possible without Ricky.
Together during the season they accumulated 304.1 points total, 176.5 for Ricky, and 127.6 for Ronnie Brown. That's a lot of running and scoring. If we had to narrow it down to one player out of the duo, obviously the healthy one, Ricky, would be an obvious choice. When Ronnie Brown went out with a season ending injury, it was up to the World Of Noise's second star back to step up his game. With his solo debut scoring 30+ points alone, you have to acknowledge how much heart he has for his team. Not Miami, the Noisey Basterds. He stepped up big when he had to, and consistency was the word for the duo. With 3 weeks (maybe 4, if my stat tracker was off) of 10 points or less, that's still many a victory for the Noisey Basterds..
So there you have it.. Jason Avant-less team has a great season, a great coach, a trustworthy staff, and most importantly a team with THE 2009 MVP for the JFL. If Ricky Williams doesn't win the MVP, well then The Noisey Basterds will be Noisey-er and Basterds-er next year and go undefeated...
We have nothing further to say…
(exits the room and throws a grenade... good bye reporters)
Ron Burgundy Conference
Chris Johnson, Toasters: So naturally, my MVP selection is Chris Johnson. I mean really, wasn't that expected?
CJ, as the toasters refer to him, is on a tear this year. Three games over 30 fantasy points, one of them being 52 big points to grab the title of most points scored by a JJFFL player [at the time. It has since been bested by Tom Brady] (And almost as much as some entire teams score...)
He leads the league in most yards (1396), 7 games of 100+ yards, and has 9 TDs so far. I would keep on going and on about how kickass he is, but don't want to gloat on how awesome my number one draft pick was.
<3
The Dottsville Toasters
Aaron Rodgers, News Team: I toyed with the idea of nominating DeSean Jackson, he has had a remarkable season and it would be nice to represent the Birds, but I gotta go with Rodgers.
What a trade we (Jimmy and I) made. Addai is looking good this year but I'm happy with the No. 1 QB. The top scorer among all players in the JimmyJam League, he's been my rock each week. Hell, he only had under 20 points in one week, and even that was 19.6. Half of his games so far this season have been for 30-plus points. Some people's entire WR corps don't get that in a given week. I know it's not a matter of who scored the most points, but if anyone's going to make this argument, it's Aaron Rodgers.
I sat him twice this year in favor of Farva, and though it didn't make a difference in the final scores, I still felt a little dirty doing so. He's my superstar and he won't see the bench again.
The top 20 QBs averaged 21.5 points, had Rodgers been in line with that I would have lost three more game, putting my record at 5-8, and out of the playoffs because two of those losses would have been to the Organ Thieves and the Generals.
He has only thrown five interceptions this season, I think Jake Delhomme averages that per game. Three of those five were in one game and he still managed 29.6 points. His off-day is still better than almost every other quarterback — because he is awesome. And this is only his second season as a starter, this kid is going places.
He also has really dreamy eyes and great hair.
EVERYONE will vote for the MVP of the conference. The top two will move on to the final vote in Week 16. In Week 15, we’ll vote for the top two MVPs from the Ron Burgundy Conference, and again, they’ll advance to Week 16.
Please read all the capsules, as written by their team owners. I would like everyone to vote objectively, remembering, it’s what the player did for the fantasy team, not what they did for their NFL team.
Office Space Conference
Joseph Addai, Jammers: I can’t believe this is the name I’m submitting. If you would have told me in August when I drafted him No. 1 that he’d be my MVP, I’d laugh at you and mock you like I do to Houserville daily.
But here I am in December, shoveling snow, freezing my ass off and saying loud and proud that Addai is my MVP.
Addai is averaging 14.1 points per week, which is nothing compared to the big-wig QBs in this League, but winning nine of my last 10 games wasn’t because of a big-wig QB. It was thanks to the consistency of Joseph Addai. He had double-digit performances in nine of my 10 wins and double-digit performances in 10 of 12 weeks.
Of the top seven RBs in fantasy, only Addai and Ray Rice have had 10 double-digit point weeks. Everyone else in the top seven has had at least three single-digit days.
He has scored nine rushing TDs and three receiving and he passed for another, totaling 14 TDs, best among all RBs in the NFL. So, he’s done it all.
He scored 14 points in a big win over the division rival Slackers in Week 5 and another 21.6 against the Slackers to complete the season sweep and wrap up the Jammers' fourth straight division title.
Addai’s 14.1 points per week were huge considering the Jammers had several close contests, finishing the regular season with a point differential of just 11.1 points. Without Addai, many of those wins turn into losses.
Instead, Addai helped the Jammers pump out the JFL’s best record at 10-3 and the No. 1 seed in the Office Space Conference for the third time in four years.
Drew Brees, Sunday Slackers: Drew Brees is the 2009 MVP for the Jimmy Jam League as well as the National Football League.
1. 29 TD passes (1st in League)
2. 344.7 total points scored (2nd in League)
3. 68.8% completion rate (3rd in League)
4. 3,536 passing yards (5th in League)
5. He has averaged 28.7 points a game (2nd in League) .
6. He moved the ball around on offense and 19 different players have scored a TD.
7. Two weeks he has scored over 50 points and only one other quarterback has one game of 50+ points and that’s Tom Brady.
8. His Team is 12-0 (more than likely they would not be 12-0 without him)
That about sums it up...
[Jimmy Jammers’ addition: Parker sent this before I specified that he needed to say why it helped his team, not the Saints. Still, touching on Point No. 8. Yes, the Saints are 12-0, but the Slackers are 7-6 with the Breesy Man. Without the fantasy franchise player, the Slackers could easily be 2-10, like they were in 2008.]
Peyton Manning, Real Houserville: I wouldn't be 7-6 if it weren't for Peyton Manning. He's thrown for 300 yards eight times (and if you round up, nine times b/c he had 299 yards in Week 11), had seven multiple-TD games (including two games with 4 TDs), and always scored me at least 16 points. He's been consistent with yardage all season and he's only had one TD-less game but still threw for 347 yards and no turnovers.
If he weren't in my lineup, it stands to reason there'd be a 20-point difference in the score in any one week, enough to seriously impact my team's record.
Ricky Williams, World of Noise: (Email opens up with the press room screaming)
Mr. Johnson, Mr. Johnson, Who is your first selection for the draft next year?
Mr. Johnson, What do you think of Tiger Wood's wife?
Mr. Johnson, What do you think of Kanye West's storming of the stage?
Sir Craig Johnson, Who is your teams MVP?
___________________Break in the action as the press room quiets down
Well.. To answer your questions in no particular order, Don't know, Hot, and he's a gay fish...
and for the man that called me Sir!.. I will answer your question as I was recently knighted by the Queen herself... So I will answer you because you called me by my correct name.
(awwwww's coming from the room)
I would like to nominate Freddie Mitchell for MVP... why... because I'd like to thank my great hands...
....excuse me (is handed paper)... ahem... I've just been informed that Freddie Mitchell is not on my team so therefore, I retract that last statement. (looks back at assistant) (covers mic) "what a bout Jason Avant? No? I didn't take him this year... Oh .. Ok.”
For this year I would like to nominate... Optimus Prime... he has been a kick ass leader of the Decepticons and well,
(tapping on shoulder)
....what! Oh.. ok.. not him either... can I see my roster...?
..Holy Shit... this is my team? all these great players? WOW... I'm not used to this...
...So I guess I would like to nominate for the 2009 JFL Season MVP Award Mr. Ricky Williams. It's been a tough year, but a good year.. Each week we would go out onto the field (or log into ESPN.com) and hope for the best. The Wildcat was outstanding this year with the duo of Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown averaging roughly 30 points together, but it would not have been possible without Ricky.
Together during the season they accumulated 304.1 points total, 176.5 for Ricky, and 127.6 for Ronnie Brown. That's a lot of running and scoring. If we had to narrow it down to one player out of the duo, obviously the healthy one, Ricky, would be an obvious choice. When Ronnie Brown went out with a season ending injury, it was up to the World Of Noise's second star back to step up his game. With his solo debut scoring 30+ points alone, you have to acknowledge how much heart he has for his team. Not Miami, the Noisey Basterds. He stepped up big when he had to, and consistency was the word for the duo. With 3 weeks (maybe 4, if my stat tracker was off) of 10 points or less, that's still many a victory for the Noisey Basterds..
So there you have it.. Jason Avant-less team has a great season, a great coach, a trustworthy staff, and most importantly a team with THE 2009 MVP for the JFL. If Ricky Williams doesn't win the MVP, well then The Noisey Basterds will be Noisey-er and Basterds-er next year and go undefeated...
We have nothing further to say…
(exits the room and throws a grenade... good bye reporters)
Ron Burgundy Conference
Chris Johnson, Toasters: So naturally, my MVP selection is Chris Johnson. I mean really, wasn't that expected?
CJ, as the toasters refer to him, is on a tear this year. Three games over 30 fantasy points, one of them being 52 big points to grab the title of most points scored by a JJFFL player [at the time. It has since been bested by Tom Brady] (And almost as much as some entire teams score...)
He leads the league in most yards (1396), 7 games of 100+ yards, and has 9 TDs so far. I would keep on going and on about how kickass he is, but don't want to gloat on how awesome my number one draft pick was.
<3
The Dottsville Toasters
Aaron Rodgers, News Team: I toyed with the idea of nominating DeSean Jackson, he has had a remarkable season and it would be nice to represent the Birds, but I gotta go with Rodgers.
What a trade we (Jimmy and I) made. Addai is looking good this year but I'm happy with the No. 1 QB. The top scorer among all players in the JimmyJam League, he's been my rock each week. Hell, he only had under 20 points in one week, and even that was 19.6. Half of his games so far this season have been for 30-plus points. Some people's entire WR corps don't get that in a given week. I know it's not a matter of who scored the most points, but if anyone's going to make this argument, it's Aaron Rodgers.
I sat him twice this year in favor of Farva, and though it didn't make a difference in the final scores, I still felt a little dirty doing so. He's my superstar and he won't see the bench again.
The top 20 QBs averaged 21.5 points, had Rodgers been in line with that I would have lost three more game, putting my record at 5-8, and out of the playoffs because two of those losses would have been to the Organ Thieves and the Generals.
He has only thrown five interceptions this season, I think Jake Delhomme averages that per game. Three of those five were in one game and he still managed 29.6 points. His off-day is still better than almost every other quarterback — because he is awesome. And this is only his second season as a starter, this kid is going places.
He also has really dreamy eyes and great hair.
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