It’s time for the most reliable — and the only — system we’ve
ever used to predict our fantasy season.
The “Jammermetric Scale” is back for a third year after
predicting three out of four division champions for the second straight season.
Oddly enough, it’s picked the Slammers to win the NL East in
consecutive seasons and both times it was the only prediction it had wrong.
Anyone want to add a hashtag conspiracy, or collusion, or
fishy to that?
Well, either way, the Jammermetric Scale was one step better
last year as for the first time, I used it to predict the playoffs.
It had the Slammers over the Outs and Otto Parts — wrong
order, but the right outcomes — to advance to the World Series, and it had the
Panthers beating the Bombers, but losing to the Gamblers in the ALCS, which was
exactly what happened.
It then had the Gamblers winning the World Series 12-9-3,
which was the only thing the system got wrong in the playoffs.
If it’s so right, why do we even play the season?
Yes, my other self, I wonder that same exact thing.
But alas, we must go on. Teams have to fight to prove the
Nostradamus of fantasy baseball wrong.
So, what’s on tap for this season?
Let me guess: The Slammers winning the division and going to
the World Series?
Nope. Not this year.
This year’s pick in the National League is the Otto Parts,
beating the NL East Champion Vandelay Industries in the NLCS for the right to
play the Gameday Gamblers in the World Series.
The Jammermetric Scale picked the Gamblers to win his third
World Series.
Eleven of us are hoping its World Series miscalculation
happens again.
Here’s a full look at the Jammermetric Scale predictions and links to each division's preview.
American League East | Preview
N.J. Bombers, 56
points (15 first-place)
Michael Coldsmith III,
46 points (3 first-place)
Sex Panthers, 38
points (6 first-place)
American League West | Preview
Gameday Gamblers,
53 points (10 first-place)
Jerkin My Kurkjian,
46 points (8 first-place)
Big League Choo,
43 points (6 first-place)
National League East | Preview
Vandelay Industries,
48 points (7 first-place)
JimmyJam Slammers,
47 points (11 first-place)
You’re Freaking Out,
43 points (5 first-place)
National League West | Preview
Chief Otto Parts,
62 points (18 first-place)
Team Suck, 47
points (5 first-place)
Steroid.ERA, 32
points (1 first-place)
ALDS
Jerkin’ over Bombers, 12-10-2
NLDS
Industries over Slammers, 12-11-1
ALCS
Gamblers over Jerkin’, 13-10-1
NLCS
Otto Parts over Industries, 17-6-1
World Series
Gamblers over Otto Parts, 13-10-2
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