JimmyJam League Baseball: Vandelay Industries wins 2014 World Series

Jeff Walter has finally achieved his dream.

No, no. He’s not playing George in a reboot of Seinfeld. I said dreams; not delusions of grandeur. We all know Vandelay Industries would love to take over the role of the man who coined the company his team is named after.

And no, I’m also not talking about his dream of winning the World Series. He was so close in 2010, and in the following years, he had run into tough divisional competition that kept his quality fantasy team out of the playoffs.

Even still, the World Series trophy is not part of his dream.

OK, I know, by now, you give up. What is his dream?

I'll tell you. He’s finally getting a championship recap!

After winning three JHL titles — that sham of a fantasy hockey league run by Slammer Selig — Vandelay did not get a single paragraph written about him. It’s eaten at him for sure. I know this because I’ve read his jabs at the commissioner about it.

But jab no more.

A 20-2-2 shellacking of Big League Choo ushers in the second straight World Series title won by a Walter, both at the expense of the Big League Choo.

And this was a Big League disappointment. After posting the best record in the JLB in 2014, Choo was no match for Vandelay who won 10 categories in pitching and batting in the beatdown.

It was such a bad lashing that TMZ is looking to pay me millions for the raw security footage.

Vandelay batted .292 with 11 homers, 44 RBIs and 38 runs scored, and on the mound, he boasted a 2.73 ERA with a CG SO, eight quality starts, eight wins and 82 strikeouts.

So, did the Choo just not show up or was this the best performance ever? Compare the final totals to last year’s World Series champion, the Outs, and you’ll find Vandelay with a 12-8-4 advantage. Even if you match it up against the biggest blowout prior to this one, the Slammers 17-6-1 win over the Gamblers in 2011, he’ll only win 11-9-4. That means, the Choo didn't show up.

Still, the solid performance on both sides is rare. Vandelay becomes only the second World Series winner to post at least a .290 average and a sub-3.00 ERA. The Slammers was the other in 2011. And out of all the teams, winners and losers, it was only the third time a World Series competitor has done it — Slammers also did it, posting the World Series best ERA of 1.74 in a loss to the Gamblers, that 11-11-3 stalemate that was continued on paper for another nine days after the fact.

This matchup certainly didn’t need 16 days. Hell, it barely needed three to decide the winner. Vandelay ran out on top on Tuesday and never looked back.

Michael Brantley could be considered the JLB MVP, batting 13-for-31 with four runs, eight singles, four doubles, a homer, three RBIs and a stolen base. Matt Kemp, who had to be a tough keeper decision back in March, paid dividends with his seven singles, seven runs, three homers and 10 RBIs.

If Brantley doesn’t get the JLB MVP, it then has to go to Adam Wainwright does. His CG SO was a huge victory for Vandelay, and his 19-9 record, 171 strikeouts and 2.45 ERA was pivotal all season. In total, Vandelay got 13 complete games and seven complete-game shutouts; Wainwright had five GGs and three SOs.

Lance Lynn, who was his first-round pick glazed over by many other drafters including myself, went 15-9 with a 2.68 ERA in the Industries lineup. Chris Sale, Danny Duffy, Cole Hamels, Jose Fernandez (while he was around) and Mike Fiers all provided sub-3.00 ERAs when in Vandelay’s lineup.


If it weren’t for the Outs, we’d call this the best pitching staff in the JLB this season, but Vandelay isn’t worried about that title. He got the only one that matters, and that’s a JLB title complete with a Jargon recap. Congrats, Jeff Walter. This has been a write-up long overdue.

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