After eight weeks, we’re starting to see who the division
races will be between.
In the NFC, both the East and West have three teams battling
for the division, while they all will be contending for the two wild card
spots. At this point, with five weeks left, it’s still too early to list all
the scenarios.
The AFC East is in the same boat in that it’s too early to
list the scenarios, but the AFC North, a.k.a., the Middle East, is ready for
some of the scenarios.
That’s because Fear and Loathing is now off to the best
start in JFL history at 8-0. He can become the first team to clinch a division
title in Week 9 with a win and losses/ties by Houserville and World of Noise.
Even without the latter, Fear can clinch a playoff spot with a win and a loss
by just one of those two teams.
The only other thing that is official is: The Generals have
officially been eliminated from the JFL Playoffs.
Of course, he’s still alive for the JFL Postseason
Challenge. Why? Because everyone is!
Fear and Loathing
116.8, T-Money 88.7
EXACTLY WHAT HE
WANTED: As a Steelers fan, Nick was in a bit of a pickle Sunday. He wanted
Andrew Luck to play well, but he didn’t want him to outplay Big Ben. Well, with
500 yards and 6 TDs, it was hard to outplay him. That allowed Luck to throw for
400 yards and three TDs (39.6 points) in a 51-34 loss. It all went right for
Fear.
INSANE: I didn’t
watch Monday night football, so when I saw at about 10 p.m., the Cowboys
weren’t doing so well, I assumed, DeMarco Murray was off his game. Nope. Another
141 yards, 80 yards receiving and 21.9 fantasy points. He’s averaging 21.4 and
his lowest point total of the season was 18.9 in Week 3. That’s just insane.
LaDainian Tomlinson had one of the most ridiculous fantasy season I ever saw
when he led me to the 2006 title, but even with all his big point totals in
that season, he still had weeks where he scored less than 10 fantasy points.
There’s still time left for Murray to fall short, but right now, he’s on pace
for one of, if not the best fantasy
season.
Jimmy Jammers 114.4,
Chinese Organ Thieves 105.1
DEZ, WHO?:
Marshawn Lynch may have only 14.1 total points since joining the Jammers two
weeks ago, but Dez Bryant hasn’t been missed. Jeremy Maclin had 36.1 points
this week (he’s ranked No. 6 among WRs) and Brandon LaFell has lived up to the
Jargon’s preseason prediction, ranking 20th. He’d be ranked higher if he and
Tom Brady were on the same page earlier. Now, he’s the go-to guy with 19
catches in his last three weeks.
WEAK SUNDAY:
After more than 65 points on Thursday night, the Thieves looked to be off to a
great start, but there wasn’t much happening on Sunday. The Chiefs defense was
the most notable with 20.8 points. Pierre Garcon had a chance to make up for
the poor Sunday, but his Monday night wasn’t much better, scoring just 5.5
points.
KICKING IT IN:
Greg Zuerlein had negative-1 points this week, which culminates a long season
at the kicking position for the Jammers. In eight weeks of football, the
Jammers has gotten a combined total of 23 points from his kickers (four
different kickers). Twenty-three points. Twenty-three! Noise’s seventh-round
pick Stephen Gostkowski had 21 in one week alone. There’s not even one kicker
in the JFL that has less than 38 points on the season (only exception, the trio
of Lions kickers, who combine for 42 points). It’s been just a poor, poor season
of mixing and matching. Time to find a kicker and stick with him.
Jerkin’ My Kirk
Herbstreit 115.9, Graybill’s Generals 110.8
BRIDGING THE GAP:
With Eli Manning on the bye, it was time for Teddy Bridgewater, and his 18.3
points weren’t close to the 23.4 Manning is averaging, but it was just enough.
Especially considering the fact that Cam Newton scored just 8.9.
ENCOURAGING: It
was nice for the Generals to get 110.8 points. It means he’s gearing up for the
JFL Postseason Challenge. His two wideout acquisitions combined for more than
30 points Sunday, but it wasn’t enough to beat the Jerk. Strangely enough, he
chose the Bengals defense against his favorite NFL team, the Ravens, over the
Dolphins playing at the Jags. That cost
him this matchup.
LOOKING GOOD, JERK:
It’s also encouraging for the Jerk. His key draftees are really heating up.
Matt Forte, Randall Cobb and T.Y. Hilton all had more than 20 points. For
Forte, it’s four straight weeks of 20-plus points, and both Hilton and Cobb
have posted double-digits in five straight weeks. That’s a big reason why he’s
won five straight games.
Team Boyer 115.3,
Choo Big TeeDees 99.3
RENAME IT ALREADY:
We’ve been on Team Boyer to come up with a real team name for years, yet he
still uses the default name ESPN gave him in 2006. He doesn’t like the
overwhelming JFL favorite name of the Spacklers, but perhaps, just maybe, he’ll
like Team Brady. He should change it to that. He owes him. Brady has been with
him all nine years and if it weren’t for him, he wouldn’t have won five
straight. With 49.5 points in Week 8, Brady has silenced the naysayers in New
England, scoring 27.8, 46.3, 33 and 49.5 in four straight weeks. He’s on fire.
NOT THE NORM: The
primary positions of RBs and WRs didn’t do much for Team Brady. Instead, his
points came from Antonio Gates (18.4), Patriots defense (11.3) and Billy
Cundiff (13). And that had to be frustrating for the Choo, who got
double-digits from three of four primary positions, including 23.7 from Mark
Ingram. The only difference was that his QB Zach Mettenberger scored 24.4
(respectable) to Brady’s 49.5. What can you do?
Shark Attack 137.5,
Chalupa Batman 100.2
FINALLY: The
six-game losing streak is over. Jawz won a game to move to 2-6, and his team
really looks good. It may be a bit too late for the playoffs, but he’ll be a
force in the postseason challenge, especially if Rob Gronkowski is officially
back. He caught nine passes for 149 yards and three TDs Sunday to set a new JFL
record for tight end fantasy points with 36.7. That should be a tough one to
break.
TOP WIDEOUT:
Gronk’s weekend was impressive, but Antonio Brown been that cool all season.
Eight weeks of football, eight weeks of double digits. He posted a season-high
30.3 points Sunday to remain the No. 1 WR in all of football.
SEE WHAT I’VE BEEN
DEALING WITH?: Chalupa scored 100.2 points and lost. He texted me and said
that fantasy football must hate him, the JFL in particular. But I don’t think
he has room to talk in a week when has it happen to Shark Attack, a team that
has six losses despite the second-most points scored in the JFL. In reality,
the JFL hates my uncle.
Philly Cheese Steaks
120.7, Real Houserville 91.1
FOSTERING WINS: The
Philly Cheese may only be at .500 with a 4-4 record, but Arian Foster’s 2014
season has got to have him hopeful of a bid to the NFC playoff bracket — maybe
even a division title. Foster is ranked third with 18.8 points per game. He’s
hit 100 yards rushing in all six games that he has been a full participant in.
FOLES KEEPING IT
GOING: The Eagles didn’t get the win Sunday, but with 411 yards and two
TDs, the Cheese Steaks was somewhat happy. The 34.9 fantasy points were a big
help in beating Houserville. And even better, in that game, LeSean McCoy had
just 10.3 points and Michael Floyd had zero.
CLOSE CALL: Aaron
Rodgers tweaked his hamstring — of course, after he scored 35.6 fantasy points
— and that had to be scary for Houserville. He can’t afford to lose him,
especially now in a big battle with the Noise — and/or the second-place team in
the AFC East — make the wild card. Yes, he still has a shot at the division,
but the odds aren’t good for that. At 4-4, he’ll need to at least go 3-2 to
have a shot. And he’ll need a healthy Rodgers to do that. He should get it with
the bye week coming for Rodgers, but that means he has at least one week
without the first overall pick.
Channel 4 News Team
95.8, Sunday Slackers 85.3
QB CONUNDRUM: You
remember that kicker issue I mentioned I had with my team? In a round about
way, Nikish has a similar issue with QBs. It’s not as bad, but this 13.1-point
week from Austin Davis really accentuates the struggles he’s had at QB. Maybe
it’s time to go back to Andy Dalton? Who knows.
BACKING UP WHOEVER IS
AT QB: Jamaal Charles and Giovani Bernard are the real reasons why the News
Team is even in contention at this point. At 4-4, he couldn’t ask for much more
based on the production at QB and WR. Charles carried the load again in Week 8,
scoring 24.5, and that was just enough to beat Parker’s bum squad.
SEEING GREEN: A.J.
Green is coming back against the Jaguars. Parker must be elated. Finally, he
gets one of his key guys back. And he needs it because the Branden Oliver flame
went out this week, and Torrey Smith disappeared with a big fat zero. The only
bad news is, if Green is back, Mohamed Sanu loses targets and numbers. But even
if that’s the case, he may roll with both in the lineup.
Dottsville Toasters
82.3, World of Noise 77.3
OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS:
The Toasters have won three straight, the Noise has lost three straight. It
wasn’t pretty with only 82.3 points, but the Toasters will take it. His biggest
output came at tight end where Heath Miller had one of his biggest days in
years, scoring 18.6 points. Russell Wilson had only 18 points, which is
concerning, but he’s a threat to score 40 any week, so he’ll stick with him for
sure. On the other side, Matt Ryan had 22.6 points, which is respectable, but
when a TD would have won it for the Noise, he has to be asking his QB for more.
PEYTON’S OLD PETS:
Wes Welker and Eric Decker. Both haven’t had the greatest 2014s. Welker has
been virtually replaced by better receivers and Decker has had Manning replaced
by worse QBs. It’s a problem that will continue on for the rest of the year for
both. For the Noise, he has other WRs. For the Toasters, he does, too, but he’ll
have to wait until Week 10 when Calvin Johnson claims he will return for sure.
A healthy, productive Megatron could make a world of difference for the
Toasters. (And for the Slammers, if I might add.)
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