Ah, what do I think about the AFC East? It’s always funny to ask this question to myself, since I’m so not biased — not one bit.
To me, I’m the clear favorite. You know it to be true. That’s why you collectively voted me to finish first. A third straight division title will be mine.
I haven’t felt this confident since, well, since that time I won a second Super Bowl and drafted virtually the same team that won me that title. I thought I was going back.
I subsequently went 3-10 and had the worst fantasy season of my life, counting baseball and football. That was one of only two losing seasons in my JFL career, and the other was a 6-7 mark that I somehow finagled into a playoff spot and rolled to the Super Bowl, which of course, I lost.
I do feel pretty confident in my squad, as for the second straight year, I drafted more than 90 percent of my targets on my ideal team.
Choo and Jerk will provide the biggest challenge, while the Slackers don’t scare me at all.
He would yell at me for that statement if he didn’t leave my house disappointed about his draft.
Perhaps after this season, he’ll wear a jacket and protect himself from that cool Brees that seems to be giving him a nasty can’t-win cold.
Oh, I should really stop talking. The Slackers beat me twice last year, including once in the playoffs to go to the AFC Championship Game.
As we’ve seen before, with Brees at QB, the Slackers are capable of beating anyone on any given week thanks to a 40-burger.
All joking aside, I’m looking forward to this division battle in 2015. All four teams have interesting squads that could come together and win. In the division, the Slackers have the best QB on paper, the Jammers have the best RB and the Choo has the best WR. … And, the Jerk has… well, he has the best, most-desired backup QB, as proven in the draft.
See, positives for everyone!
AFC East Poll
1. Jimmy Jammers, 36 points (4 first-place votes)
2. Sunday Slackers, 30 points (3 first-place votes)
3. Choo Big TeeDees, 28 points (3 first-place votes)
4. Jerkin’ My Kirk Herbstreit, 26 points (2 first-place votes)
1. Jimmy Jammers
2014 Record, Finish: 8-5, 1st in AFC East
Career Record : 82-50
Playoff Record: 9-6
★★★½☆ QB
★★★★★ RB
★★★★☆ WR/TE
Back to basics as the Jammers go back to the backs
It was 2010.
That's the answer.
Yes, I’m sure you were all asking yourselves, “When was the last time the Jammers kept a running back?”
We known for my love of wideouts, as I had kept a WR for four straight seasons until Marshawn Lynch got the nod as a first-round keeper this season.
Not only did I keep a running back, I drafted one rather quickly, too, adding Doug Martin in the third round. Last year, I drafted a then-two-game suspended Ray Rice in the fourth round and didn’t add anything of any substance after that.
When Rice’s suspension went from two games to forever, I was dead in the water at running back.
So, this year, I’m compensating for that loss, and I like what I have going. If Doug Martin is healthy and can play like he did in the preseason, I’m satisfied that I’ll have a duo of backs that could rival Fear and Loathing’s dynamic duo from 2014.
Matthew Stafford returns, and his 2014 was rather disappointing, but he gets a healthy Megatron back, so that should help him return to the form we saw in 2013. And if he goes down, my Hard Knocks QB tandem will take over.
Hard Knocks leads me at wideout with DeAndre Hopkins, and he, Larry Fitzgerald and Terrance Williams will get the majority of the starts.
The majority of my lineup is out Week 9, so Houserville should easily win that week, but in the other 12 weeks of the season, I will have a full lineup. I like my chances in that scenario.
But I guess that’s why I drafted them. Of course I like it.
Man, this has been such a biased take on my team. Maybe I should have had that Dan Graybill guy write my preview.
2. Sunday Slackers
2014 Record, Finish: 7-6, 3rd in AFC East
Career Record : 48-49-1
Playoff Record: 4-3
★★★★☆ QB
★★★½☆ RB
★★★☆☆ WR/TE
Can’t get rid of Brees, for better or worse, who knows?
There are some dogs that really struggle when their owners leave them home alone. Even two minutes alone can feel like days to them and they go crazy.
For a brief moment this offseason, I'm sure Drew Brees had left his team as Parker thought about keeping another player.
A few minutes rolled by and Parker was antsy, running around the house, checking every window to see if Brees was coming back.
He couldn’t take it.
So he finally decided that was it; he couldn’t let Brees go. Not yet.
And the QB who he drafted in the expansion draft in 2008 remains on the roster yet again, despite his draft rankings in other leagues.
There’s a chance that the Slackers could have let Brees go into the draft and got him in the second round, but it wasn’t a risk worth taking for the Slackers.
For him, with Brees on his roster, it makes sleeping at night so much better; you know, like downing a few doses of Nyquil — the nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, coughing aching, stuffy head, fever, so you can rest easy in last place medicine.
That’s where the Slackers could be this year. It's where he finished in baseball and Justin Forsett and the grouping of wideouts don’t do it for me. I'd give him a better chance at winning baseball with them.
Melvin Gordon is an “if” and Forsett is a big question mark for me. Of all his RBs, I actually like Giovani Bernard the most. I think last year was an aberration, and I think you’ll see some more fantasy points out of him. Jeremy Hill will still be a big part of the offense, but I think Bernard will get some points back.
Even if that does happen, the Slackers don’t get their best WR back till Week 5 due to a suspension and Vincent Jackson is a man amongst deep sleepers outside of that.
At 7-6, the Slackers snuck into the playoffs last year. I don’t think he’ll be able to do that this year.
3. Choo Big TeeDees
2014 Record, Finish: 5-8, 4th in AFC East
Career Record : 5-8
Playoff Record: 0-0
★★★☆☆ QB
★★☆★☆ RB
★★★★☆ WR/TE
Beckham’s catch not as great as Choo’s 10th-round catch of Beckham
Due to my lack of faith in Adrian Peterson, I think Choo had the best keeper in the JFL in 2015. Odell Beckham Jr. was a solid selection in the 10th round, and Choo added T.Y. Hilton in the first round to bolster his WR corps.
It was an interesting pick that early, but you draft who you want no matter what round it is.
Choo also added Julian Edelman, Allen Hurns and Mohamed Sanu, who all could see playing time, depending on what his top two RBs do.
LeSean McCoy is battling injuries and will play for a bad Buffalo Bills team, while Frank Gore shifts gears and puts on a Colts jersey. Gore is an ageless wonder, who I always think is done, and then, he punches out a thousand-yard season.
Playing for a strong Colts offense should only help him do it again. I have my doubts, but Mr. Gore continues to amaze me.
Choo will need that and McCoy to pan out so he can tie them with Hilton and OBJ.
Together, those four could score some serious fantasy points.
That leaves one last position for Choo, and it’s QB.
He went back-to-back with QBs in the seventh and eighth rounds of the draft. First, he grabbed Blake Bortles, a pick that was ridiculed by many, but I think those who did make fun of him are greatly mistaken.
I had the chance to keep Bortles in the 15th round — it would have been 17th if we didn’t delete two roster positions — but I held off because the smart pick was to keep Marshawn Lynch.
That doesn’t mean that I doubt Bortles. Not at all. I truly believe he’s destined to be a star. I just couldn’t bear to lose a top-tier back for a QB who hasn’t proven himself yet. Because no matter what I think, when it comes down to it, Lynch is a Top-3 fantasy star, Bortles is not.
Under Choo, Bortles has the chance to do that. He’s looked better with his decisions in preseason and I think you’ll see a more accurate Bortles in 2015.
Choo did add Flacco in the next round for the same reason I didn’t keep Bortles. There’s still that “what if I’m wrong” factor that makes you have to plan accordingly.
But if you’re right, oh boy, you have a situation like we saw with Fear and Andrew Luck. Draft your franchise QB and hold on to them forever.
Or, you can go the News Team route and trade your first-born to get that QB back.
4. Jerkin’ My Kirk Herbstreit
2014 Record, Finish: 7-6, 2nd in AFC East
Career Record : 7-6
Playoff Record: 0-1
★★★☆☆ QB
★★☆☆☆ RB
★★★★½ WR/TE
Sophomore slump in for the Jerk after a playoff-run in first year
Jerk was the only expansion team to make the playoffs last season. In 2015, he could be the only member of the 2014 expansion class to miss it.
Batman, Cheese Steaks and Choo all have decent squads who I think can contend for wild cards, if not division titles.
The Jerk, on the other hand, has a QB problem, an oft-injured star RB and a trio of wideouts who will have to carry him to the playoffs.
The draft told us something about Teddy Bridgewater — everyone wanted him for their backup QBs. Jerk kept him as a starter.
And because Colin Kaepernick has never been a consistent fantasy starter, Jerk will wind up starting Bridgewater often. To me, he has two streaky QBs who will make you second-guess yourself each week. Jerk will just go crazy every Monday looking back at 30 points on the bench he missed out on because that QB scored just 10 points in a loss the week prior.
It’s a tough situation to be in.
Arian Foster will create a similar situation at running back as his injuries will cause the Jerk to choose between Mark Ingram, Shane Vereen and David Johnson — RBs who will not be consistent enough to start on a week-to-week basis.
At least, for the Jerk’s sake, he’ll only need to start one of those RBs, because to me, he’s starting three WRs weekly. Randall Cobb, A.J. Green and Jeremy Maclin make up a great starting trio, and even DeVante Parker and Markus Wheaton open up the opportunity for a breakout starter down the line.
The WRs, mixed with healthy Foster weeks and productive Bridgewater outings will lead Jerk to some wins, but to me, it will not be enough to amass the wins needed for a playoff spot.
To me, I’m the clear favorite. You know it to be true. That’s why you collectively voted me to finish first. A third straight division title will be mine.
I haven’t felt this confident since, well, since that time I won a second Super Bowl and drafted virtually the same team that won me that title. I thought I was going back.
I subsequently went 3-10 and had the worst fantasy season of my life, counting baseball and football. That was one of only two losing seasons in my JFL career, and the other was a 6-7 mark that I somehow finagled into a playoff spot and rolled to the Super Bowl, which of course, I lost.
I do feel pretty confident in my squad, as for the second straight year, I drafted more than 90 percent of my targets on my ideal team.
Choo and Jerk will provide the biggest challenge, while the Slackers don’t scare me at all.
He would yell at me for that statement if he didn’t leave my house disappointed about his draft.
Perhaps after this season, he’ll wear a jacket and protect himself from that cool Brees that seems to be giving him a nasty can’t-win cold.
Oh, I should really stop talking. The Slackers beat me twice last year, including once in the playoffs to go to the AFC Championship Game.
As we’ve seen before, with Brees at QB, the Slackers are capable of beating anyone on any given week thanks to a 40-burger.
All joking aside, I’m looking forward to this division battle in 2015. All four teams have interesting squads that could come together and win. In the division, the Slackers have the best QB on paper, the Jammers have the best RB and the Choo has the best WR. … And, the Jerk has… well, he has the best, most-desired backup QB, as proven in the draft.
See, positives for everyone!
AFC East Poll
1. Jimmy Jammers, 36 points (4 first-place votes)
2. Sunday Slackers, 30 points (3 first-place votes)
3. Choo Big TeeDees, 28 points (3 first-place votes)
4. Jerkin’ My Kirk Herbstreit, 26 points (2 first-place votes)
1. Jimmy Jammers
2014 Record, Finish: 8-5, 1st in AFC East
Career Record : 82-50
Playoff Record: 9-6
★★★½☆ QB
★★★★★ RB
★★★★☆ WR/TE
Back to basics as the Jammers go back to the backs
It was 2010.
That's the answer.
Yes, I’m sure you were all asking yourselves, “When was the last time the Jammers kept a running back?”
Not only did I keep a running back, I drafted one rather quickly, too, adding Doug Martin in the third round. Last year, I drafted a then-two-game suspended Ray Rice in the fourth round and didn’t add anything of any substance after that.
When Rice’s suspension went from two games to forever, I was dead in the water at running back.
So, this year, I’m compensating for that loss, and I like what I have going. If Doug Martin is healthy and can play like he did in the preseason, I’m satisfied that I’ll have a duo of backs that could rival Fear and Loathing’s dynamic duo from 2014.
Matthew Stafford returns, and his 2014 was rather disappointing, but he gets a healthy Megatron back, so that should help him return to the form we saw in 2013. And if he goes down, my Hard Knocks QB tandem will take over.
Hard Knocks leads me at wideout with DeAndre Hopkins, and he, Larry Fitzgerald and Terrance Williams will get the majority of the starts.
The majority of my lineup is out Week 9, so Houserville should easily win that week, but in the other 12 weeks of the season, I will have a full lineup. I like my chances in that scenario.
But I guess that’s why I drafted them. Of course I like it.
Man, this has been such a biased take on my team. Maybe I should have had that Dan Graybill guy write my preview.
2. Sunday Slackers
2014 Record, Finish: 7-6, 3rd in AFC East
Career Record : 48-49-1
Playoff Record: 4-3
★★★★☆ QB
★★★½☆ RB
★★★☆☆ WR/TE
Can’t get rid of Brees, for better or worse, who knows?
There are some dogs that really struggle when their owners leave them home alone. Even two minutes alone can feel like days to them and they go crazy.
For a brief moment this offseason, I'm sure Drew Brees had left his team as Parker thought about keeping another player.
He couldn’t take it.
So he finally decided that was it; he couldn’t let Brees go. Not yet.
And the QB who he drafted in the expansion draft in 2008 remains on the roster yet again, despite his draft rankings in other leagues.
There’s a chance that the Slackers could have let Brees go into the draft and got him in the second round, but it wasn’t a risk worth taking for the Slackers.
For him, with Brees on his roster, it makes sleeping at night so much better; you know, like downing a few doses of Nyquil — the nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, coughing aching, stuffy head, fever, so you can rest easy in last place medicine.
That’s where the Slackers could be this year. It's where he finished in baseball and Justin Forsett and the grouping of wideouts don’t do it for me. I'd give him a better chance at winning baseball with them.
Melvin Gordon is an “if” and Forsett is a big question mark for me. Of all his RBs, I actually like Giovani Bernard the most. I think last year was an aberration, and I think you’ll see some more fantasy points out of him. Jeremy Hill will still be a big part of the offense, but I think Bernard will get some points back.
Even if that does happen, the Slackers don’t get their best WR back till Week 5 due to a suspension and Vincent Jackson is a man amongst deep sleepers outside of that.
At 7-6, the Slackers snuck into the playoffs last year. I don’t think he’ll be able to do that this year.
3. Choo Big TeeDees
2014 Record, Finish: 5-8, 4th in AFC East
Career Record : 5-8
Playoff Record: 0-0
★★★☆☆ QB
★★☆★☆ RB
★★★★☆ WR/TE
Beckham’s catch not as great as Choo’s 10th-round catch of Beckham
Due to my lack of faith in Adrian Peterson, I think Choo had the best keeper in the JFL in 2015. Odell Beckham Jr. was a solid selection in the 10th round, and Choo added T.Y. Hilton in the first round to bolster his WR corps.
Choo also added Julian Edelman, Allen Hurns and Mohamed Sanu, who all could see playing time, depending on what his top two RBs do.
LeSean McCoy is battling injuries and will play for a bad Buffalo Bills team, while Frank Gore shifts gears and puts on a Colts jersey. Gore is an ageless wonder, who I always think is done, and then, he punches out a thousand-yard season.
Playing for a strong Colts offense should only help him do it again. I have my doubts, but Mr. Gore continues to amaze me.
Choo will need that and McCoy to pan out so he can tie them with Hilton and OBJ.
Together, those four could score some serious fantasy points.
That leaves one last position for Choo, and it’s QB.
He went back-to-back with QBs in the seventh and eighth rounds of the draft. First, he grabbed Blake Bortles, a pick that was ridiculed by many, but I think those who did make fun of him are greatly mistaken.
I had the chance to keep Bortles in the 15th round — it would have been 17th if we didn’t delete two roster positions — but I held off because the smart pick was to keep Marshawn Lynch.
That doesn’t mean that I doubt Bortles. Not at all. I truly believe he’s destined to be a star. I just couldn’t bear to lose a top-tier back for a QB who hasn’t proven himself yet. Because no matter what I think, when it comes down to it, Lynch is a Top-3 fantasy star, Bortles is not.
Under Choo, Bortles has the chance to do that. He’s looked better with his decisions in preseason and I think you’ll see a more accurate Bortles in 2015.
Choo did add Flacco in the next round for the same reason I didn’t keep Bortles. There’s still that “what if I’m wrong” factor that makes you have to plan accordingly.
But if you’re right, oh boy, you have a situation like we saw with Fear and Andrew Luck. Draft your franchise QB and hold on to them forever.
Or, you can go the News Team route and trade your first-born to get that QB back.
4. Jerkin’ My Kirk Herbstreit
2014 Record, Finish: 7-6, 2nd in AFC East
Career Record : 7-6
Playoff Record: 0-1
★★★☆☆ QB
★★☆☆☆ RB
★★★★½ WR/TE
Sophomore slump in for the Jerk after a playoff-run in first year
Jerk was the only expansion team to make the playoffs last season. In 2015, he could be the only member of the 2014 expansion class to miss it.
Batman, Cheese Steaks and Choo all have decent squads who I think can contend for wild cards, if not division titles.
The draft told us something about Teddy Bridgewater — everyone wanted him for their backup QBs. Jerk kept him as a starter.
And because Colin Kaepernick has never been a consistent fantasy starter, Jerk will wind up starting Bridgewater often. To me, he has two streaky QBs who will make you second-guess yourself each week. Jerk will just go crazy every Monday looking back at 30 points on the bench he missed out on because that QB scored just 10 points in a loss the week prior.
It’s a tough situation to be in.
Arian Foster will create a similar situation at running back as his injuries will cause the Jerk to choose between Mark Ingram, Shane Vereen and David Johnson — RBs who will not be consistent enough to start on a week-to-week basis.
At least, for the Jerk’s sake, he’ll only need to start one of those RBs, because to me, he’s starting three WRs weekly. Randall Cobb, A.J. Green and Jeremy Maclin make up a great starting trio, and even DeVante Parker and Markus Wheaton open up the opportunity for a breakout starter down the line.
The WRs, mixed with healthy Foster weeks and productive Bridgewater outings will lead Jerk to some wins, but to me, it will not be enough to amass the wins needed for a playoff spot.
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