It’s hard to figure out a Choo. He makes so many head scratching
moves, yet year after year, he’s right there.
I don’t see why he won’t be there again.
And at face value, that’s a shocker considering the fact that he
sent ace pitchers Clayton Kershaw and Noah Syndergaard off to the Cheese
Steaks.
But he replaced and set up a rotation that includes four
starters who have 180-plus-strikeout potential. Jon Gray, Carlos Martinez,
Robbie Ray and Masahiro Tanaka aren’t necessarily the flashy names, but they
should get the job done for Choo.
They’re sneaky good.
“Sneaky in the sense my rotation does not have any household
names such as Kershaw or Syndergaard,” Choo said, “but if one were to follow
the right ‘experts’ on Twitter, you would know pitching-wise….wait….Crox doesn’t
have Twitter….I see a trend….anyway, would know that household names do not matter
in fantasy.”
Choo says those experts have Martinez as a dark-horse NL Cy
Young candidate and Ray as the next Max Scherzer.
If that’s the case, let’s talk about Cheese Steaks 2018 keepers
Robbie Ray and Carlos Martinez! Am I right?
I kid — sort of — so let’s dive back into the mind of one crazy
Choo.
“Masahiro Tanaka was in the AL Cy Young conversation last year
and Tanner Roark is an xFIP magician, and if Jim Leyland likes him, then hell,
I like him, too. Lance Lynn could potentially get back to his 1K/1IP ratio from
his rookie year, as he came back at the end of 2016 (in minors/simulated games)
healthy and throwing harder than ever.”
And that’s how a Choo thinks. Gina is quickly Googling xFIP.
His mind is a crazy thing, which is why I gave him a bit of a
mind-cruncher of a question in which will be the higher number: Billy Hamilton’s stolen bases
or the combined HR total for Nolan Arenado and Gary Sanchez?
“This is a tough one,” Choo said. “I think Hamilton
actually steals more than his 2016 total of 58, somewhere in the neighborhood
of 65 – and that’s due to his year-over-year improvement in OBP, which I
forecast to continue trending in the right direction. Arenado is a lock for 40
HRs, and Sanchez hit 20 HRs in like 20 at-bats last year, so I am going to go
with the over.”
So, that’s 69 homers — he made a joke there that I’ll let
you just ponder without me relaying it to you — and 65 stolen bases. We’ll see how that pans out. I personally think
Hamilton wins 61-58.
It’s an old Big East basketball game — and it’s not that crazy of a prediction.
Not like Choo’s Addison Russell NL MVP prediction.
“That’s all I need to say,” Choo said. “Thanks, J.V.!”
Now, I won’t go that far, but I do like the acquisition
of Russell. Could be the steal of the offseason in trades. If he plays close to
the level that I think he will, that could be the case.
Gary Sanchez could be the bigger steal if it weren’t for
the fact that he basically gave up on Willson Contreras to get Sanchez. Kind of a wash in my mind. ... But not for Choo.
First, let’s start with the fact that I had no clue
Willson was spelled with two ‘L’s. I missed that big time and only found out
during Choo’s glorious rant on why he chose Sanchez over Contreras, and no, the
Yankee logo did not factor in.
“Not because of the pinstripes, no,” he said. “It’s because of
the Gary’s huge freaking forearms. Just kidding. The reasoning is because of
Willson’s manager, Joe Maddon. I can only envision a Schwarber-esque collision
while Willson runs rampant (a la Bryce Harper) in the OF one out of every five
days. Willson also is a dumb freaking name. Super dumb. Imagine if Bombers’ name
was Kylle Firestine. Super dumb. I’ll go with Gary over Willson. Did I mention
Gary’s forearms?”
And folks, there’s a reason people get antsy when Choo shows up
to the gym — he just stares at everyone's forearms thinking, Could they beat Gary?
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