I’m a big fan of soccer.
I love it.
I don’t care what the naysayers say about it, it’s a great game. The European leagues are top-notch and a blast to watch.
I enjoy a 1-0 win. I even enjoy a 1-1 draw.
Yes, a draw, a.k.a. a tie.
It’s what people use as a constant knock on soccer.
So, of course, we would have a tie in the JFL, the first since 2011.
Barring a stat correction, Fear and Loathing and your favorite Jimmy Jammers tied with 121.5 points.
A last-minute tackle by Barry Church saved me from having to deal with a heart-breaking 121.5-121.3 loss.
In any case, as Parker so greatly pointed out, I’ve watched opponents put up 265.1 points in just two weeks. The next highest total is 219.5 points.
You thought soccer was silly? I say fantasy football is.
Let’s also talk about how Fear and Loathing reached 121.5 points.
Ryan Fitzpatrick, the Parker Dunbar Waiver Wire Pickup of the Year candidate, has scored 111 of his 229 points this season. The QB is averaging 55.5 points after another 49.9 points in Week 2.
That I could overcome, but the difference was his defender Kevin Byard, who scored 13.4 points last week.
How?
Oh, you know, he threw a 66-yard TD pass. As if Ryan Fitzpatrick wasn’t throwing enough TD passes, he had to have a defender throw one on a fake punt of all things.
Even Fear’s backup QB Joe Flacco is ranked 10th in the JFL.
Seriously. Why the hell did any of us draft a QB?
NO REGERTS
I’ve been afraid to open up the draft recap and see who I drafted over Patrick Mahomes.
I couldn’t remember if Nikish took him later in the draft when I decided to go for my boy Joey Bosa.
Seeing as Joey Bosa hasn’t played a snap in 2018 yet, I was super scared to find out if it was him.
Finally, I grew the courage to look and I was somewhat relieved to find out it was a different player who hasn’t played a snap this season — Alshon Jeffery.
Man, does he have some work to do to make me feel somewhat better about that pick.
Mahomes is the No. 2-ranked QB in the JFL, only because Fitzpatrick is on fire. He didn’t even start for the News Team in Week 1, and after 41.6 points, Nikish decided it was time.
With 53.8 points in Week 2, the News Team easily joined the Sunday Slackers and Graybill’s Generals at 2-0.
If Mahomes keeps this up, he’ll be 12-0-1.
Yes, he and I are going to tie.
That’s what always happens in football, right?
SO LET IT BE WRITTEN, SO LET IT BE UNDONE
Lastly, some bad news for Nick Nikish. The Supreme Court heard the case of the State vs. Matthew Boyer, and ruled that it was unconstitutional for President Trump to sign an executive order forcing Team Boyer to change his name to The Spacklers.
Lastly, some bad news for Nick Nikish. The Supreme Court heard the case of the State vs. Matthew Boyer, and ruled that it was unconstitutional for President Trump to sign an executive order forcing Team Boyer to change his name to The Spacklers.
The Court, with a 5-3 decision on Monday, ordered that the team name “Team Boyer” be restored and that his QB Tom Brady should have a stud wide receiver to throw to.
So with that, the Browns gifted the Pats Josh Gordon, and the commish made the overnight switch from The Spacklers to Team Boyer.
At 0-2, Boyer is probably better off going back to the old anyway.
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