Who needs RBIs anyway?
Choo doesn’t.
He just traded 78 homers
and 234 RBIs by two players — Nolan Arenado and Josh Bell — for a catching and pitching prospect, a first-round pick, an ace of the past and a shortstop who was a .256
hitter last year.
It’s quite baffling from
where I sit, but I’m not the head of the Choo Corp., and he stands by his deal.
That’s fine. He has that
right. We all do.
For the Cheese Steaks, he
knew he had to flip one of his aging SPs — and he did so in a big way. He also
managed to get rid of the guy who he had regretted acquiring for a while now.
Now, JV has an infield
that includes Nolan Arenado, Francisco Lindor and Rhys Hoskins. Give him a few
weeks and he’ll easily flip one of those other older pitchers for the star
second baseman to complete that infield.
Why do I say, "easily?"
Because he is one helluva a salesman. He's shown that in the past and he's back at it.
So be wary if you look out your peephole and see this man.
He may have the latest, greatest, "state-of-the-art" vacuum — the Machado 300M Series — but at the end of the day, it still sucks.
Then again, maybe I shouldn't avoid him. Maybe I should look for his help!
I could use his help
selling some Mark Patrick novels. Sales have really dropped off since I don’t
have a major distributor.
What advice do you have,
JV? Can you start including my two novels in your trade offers? What about your
negotiations for contracts with WFMZ? And maybe when you get those emcee gigs?
Here's how it would go:
“Sure, you can have my
talents," JV says, "but you must also buy my friend's novel. It’s good. Really good. It’s
a bit older but still gets the job done with a 4.62 rating on GoodReads.com. I
think that the book would look really good in your hands. It will really round out
your weekend and improve your reading skills down the line.”
Customer: "That sounds great. I'm in. I'll buy both books. Where do I sign?"
[Slight pause]
I've got them right where I want them, JV sneers on the inside.
"Here, I'll get the paperwork set up for you to sign... But hey, before you sign, might I ask what books you'll remove from your bookshelf to make room for these two new fancy Mark Patrick novels? I'd gladly take them off your hands."
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