The JLB playoffs are here — cue the Fallout Boy song of the year — and the Slammers are back in it.
Note, I didn't write that last line until after Quad Eh said something.
"But you would have written it anyway," would certainly be his retort, and to that, I say: Sure, maybe.
In any case, I'm finally back.
To which Parker would now say, "Well, only because you're in the NL."
And yes, while that may be true this year that I am the benefactor of that, I have to say, it's well deserved considering the number of fourth-place, winning record seasons I had during the Walter years.
Besides, I'm just a mental screw-up with pitching minimums from actually having a winning record. Technicalities, I know.
Nonetheless, I'm here and ready to party. And apparently, so are my young guys as a couple rookies notched 9 hits on day one.
I'm jinxing this in the worst way. Let's get to the NLDS and ALDS matchups!
Bensalem Slammers (211-216-53) vs. Philly Cheese Steaks (252-181-47)
Playoff Records
Slammers, 7th appearance, 9-4 overall, 3-1 in World Series (0 that count)
Cheese Steaks, 9th appearance, 8-5 overall, 3-1 in World Series
The Cheese is back and looking for World Series title No. 4. The Slammers are back and looking for World Series title No. 4.
Yet for one of us, getting the title will feel like the first time, because it's been so long and the running joke is that I don't have a real title.
The rebuild has taken hold, and even though I'd be the first admit that this isn't going to be my year, I have to say, I like my chances. JV didn't beat me during the regular season with a pair of defeats and an early-season tie.
"Looks like it will be Steaks/Slammers in round one," JV said on August 21.
"Which is scary!" I said back.
JV hasn't talked to me since.
I think he may be worried.
Ah, who am I kidding? JV had the best pitching staff once again in the JLB. His 3.33 ERA with a 134 wins and 1,823 Ks were a big reason why he cruised to 250-plus wins for the fifth time in franchise history. He had a solid bullpen that record 81 saves, 121 holds and 127 IRS. Just silly numbers.
So for the Slammers to somehow keep the No. 3-seed magic going — a trend we talked about a couple years back with Quad Eh's run — I'll have to hope for some big offense and just enough stats in the compiling categories on the pitching side to make up for what will inevitably be a flawless ERA/WHIP week for JV.
The only thing in my favor is since July 1, I've been in the top four in both pitching and hitting — but then again, so has JV.
Crox Sox (221-191-68) vs. Big League Choo (233-186-61)
Playoff Records
Crox Sox 5th appearance, 4-4 overall, 0-2 World Series
Choo, 8th appearance, 6-7 overall, 0-4 World Series
Crox held off the Gamblers for the final spot in the AL and now he has to face the Choo. These are two teams that are like the Slammers — they've never won a real World Series title.
Choo was the top offense during the regular season and Crox was No. 3, so this matchup will likely be decided on this front. Who can have the better at-bats this week. And if Choo's pitching continues to be as good as it was during the season, Crox will need to take a good number of batting categories.
Crox is batting a JLB-best .294 since July 1, so he certainly has the firepower to do it. Choo's home run totals, however, have been a big boost in his record. He has only lost homer runs 5 times this year, and only once since Week 7. Similar for RBIs, which he has only lost 6 times.
That said, it's 10:35 p.m. on Monday and Crox has 3 bombs to Choo's zero. ... Two of those homers are from Anthony Santander.
Wait, Crox works for Santander.
Something is fishy here. Damn banks. You can never trust them.
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